An Important Announcement and This Title Isn't Vague At All

I have big news that I've been waiting to share publicly for a couple weeks now. I just needed to make sure all was well before telling anyone, especially with my tendency to jinx myself. (True story: When I was young, I fell a lot. My legs were pretty much permanently scraped up from falling for a year. It was bad. I remember walking back from lunch with my friend Dora and proudly telling her, "Wow, I haven't fallen in a month. I don't even have scabs on my legs anymore." As I went in for a high five to celebrate, I lost my balance, fell, and cut my knee open on the concrete. It was so bad the school nurse - who obviously knew me quite well - said that I was super close to needing stitches. I was not joking when I said I have a tendency to jinx myself.)

This is what we looked like around that time. I look like I'm going to eat her, but that's just because we're at a restaurant and our food hasn't come yet and even though I've eaten breadsticks already I want that steak I ordered something awful.

So, the announcement. Are you ready for this? It's big. Quite big. Gideon and I have taken the next step in our relationship in a really - you guessed it - big way.

Here goes: I convinced Gideon to watch Lost. He's already finished seasons one and two and is halfway through season three.

(I know you probably thought I was going to say that we decided to adopt another cat, but unfortunately our apartment contract specifies that we can have only one cat. I am very sad about this.)

As you know, I am hugely obsessed with Lost. I am so obsessed with Lost that when someone says the word "lost," I think of the show. My mother does, too, but she's much less excited about it compared to me. I took Gideon home about a month ago and while discussing my childhood obsessions, she looked at Gideon and seriously said, "You should be grateful you weren't around for the Lost years." Similarly, when discussing the show with Gideon's mother, she said, "But it's over now, right?" I misunderstood her and responded, "For some people but never for me."

This obsession runs deep, like Charlie Sheen's drug habit or Shia LaBeouf's aversion to all non-douchebag behavior. When Gideon first said he wanted to watch the show, I warned him several times, saying, "You really don't have to do this. I don't think you understand - I love you and you don't have to do this. This is not a thing you have to do. Do you understand?" He seemed to get it, so we watched the first season and then the second and now the third and he still enjoys it and I'm very happy about all this.

I had waited to tell people because I didn't want him to hate the show or to start hating the show, effectively killing this happy announcement. But he seems to enjoy it, so I'm letting everyone know. I'm aware that it is kind of sad that I consider this big news. I don't care. I love Lost (so much that I initially wrote "I lost Lost"). Anyway, I gave up all my shame five years ago when I accidentally mooned an entire Wendy's restaurant. I've got nothing to be embarrassed about now.

Update on yesterday's post: Gideon saw it and told me that the gif made it "perfect," so you can rest easy knowing that the way I depict my life is 100% accurate. When I say "you," I am clearly exempting my mother, who I have embarrassed even more than I've embarrassed myself.